When my friends first smoked, for many years, in fact, they say, it calmed them and felt enjoyable because of the pick-up and buzz it provided. It was also a social act to them. It provided a break at work where they had an excuse to talk to friends and smoke for a few minutes. So there was a social element arising from associating smoking with growing up and being with your family and peers as an “equal.”
You’ll go to a bar with your buddies, and only know the three people you came with. However, the moment you go outside for a cigarette (because regulations state that you can’t smoke indoors anymore), you immediately meet new people who smoke. Much bumming of cigarettes/lights occurs, and sometimes, genuine new connections are formed. So what you’ve cited as an “inconvenience” is actually an opportunity to make new acquaintances.
At first, you have all of these reasons that you start smoking and want to smoke, and the addiction includes a dependency on how the cigarettes make you feel. Eventually, you no longer smoke because of anything else but what you actually get from the act of smoking. You smoke to stop feeling the way you do when you aren’t smoking.
For years, you had told yourself that it was pointless to ask someone to quit, because, in order to successfully quit, you have to do it for yourself and not be talked/pushed into it. And now, you have to realize that you would never quit until you personally “no longer want” to smoke. And if you are never going to stop, you are needed to admit that to yourself. That’s the moment when you will have a crystal-clear realization about the whole situation.
You started smoking because everyone else did and it seemed normal and then you kept smoking because it was the only way to feel normal. There is, as anyone who has ever been addicted to it will tell you, a physical relief which comes with both the nicotine effect and the very routine of smoking. Which is why so many smokers sigh with relief after first few drags off a cigarette when they’ve been kept from smoking for a long period or been angered or stressed. It is the very ritual of lighting the cigarette, inhaling the smoke, then exhaling it and feeling the rush of the stimulant and the calming effect of the ritual.
- I feel like there are three main reasons people continue smoking:
you actually enjoy the chemical effects of nicotine,
you enjoy the social aspects of smoking,
and/or you hate yourself.
Most Of Us Have Been Guilty Of Smoking For The Second And Third Reason.
You are not alone. There are almost as many ex-smokers as there are smokers. Yes, so what makes them different? They have had this so-called pleasure and denied for a better part of their life. They actually dared enough to face their reality in full consciousness and never tried to escape from it to fall into a false sense of control. You are nothing but a victim of the process. They are no super humans and are just as ordinary as anyone of you guys and all they had were guts and a sense of responsibility for themselves.
Actually, you do not have to get rid of the cigarettes but of this shallow feeling which you carry inside. The insecurities, the expectations, the urge to fit in, because at the end of the day they won’t matter. Nothing will, nothing has. You are complete and whole. Do not compromise with the morals, the rules you have set in, do not compare yourself to the other guy who seems to fit in well. You don’t know what it took him to get there or how much he gave up. Being envious is easy, giving in is easy, but facing the challenge and difficulties in your true senses is what requires guts. You are tough. You can handle. Believe in yourself and everything will work out fine.
I know how this thing works. This thing is beautiful. It’s bad at times. It makes you feel best about yourself. It makes you feel worst. It keeps you happy at times when you see those eyes gleaming with joy which brought you to this universe. It keeps you sad when you aren’t able to arrive at a solution that you have been looking for. It brings you stress for the things you are expecting to happen. It does this. It does that. But trust me, it’s not bad at all.
It is good to smoke and consider your worries are faded away. But this never happens. They stay inside until we feel them and face them.
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